Leap Bleeps

And so this is Leap Day, our quadrannual (?) gift of an extra day, thrown in like an extra donut or a post-prandial mint. Lagniappe for the effort of making it through another 3 x 365 days cycle. The proverbial bone thrown at us for enduring. But why February? Don't we deserve a July 32nd a helluva lot more than a February 29th? Come on, Congress, do something about that. One would think that by now, with our computerized precision, we could do better than the old, well, we'll just throw in an extra day every few years to balance the ledger method.

Oh well, by my digital count this is the 13th Leap Day of my life. Nearly a fortnight of extras. And so, like a CD or DVD reissue packed with all sorts of bonus "extras," I'll celebrate Leap Day by gifting you all with some outtakes, some bonus extras from this blog. What follows are scraps from the spitoutyourgum cutting room floor (believe it or not, one does exist). There's no context, no order, no explanation--it's a rainy gray day in February after all; you get what you get. Enjoy.

• So I said, "I'll pay for the first two months of Weight Watchers if you give me a lap dance right now."
• shenanigans
• To make a long story short ... (excised from countless posts)
• Turns out it wasn't a freckle after all.
• (And let me just add here that in no time was the llama ever in harm's way, though the same can't be said for Hector's sanity, which, if I had enough time, strength, cash, and patience, I could expound on forever, but as I don't, plus the fact that Hector is now somewhat respectably engaged to the lion tamer, makes practically this whole parenthetical insertion kind of moot).
• "But Popular Mechanics wasn't published in the time of Noah, Dan, that's the whole point."
• For Lent I've decided to try to embrace the artistry of Journey.
• picayune/jejune/croon/Boone/Al Toon/cocoon/chewn
• There's got to be at least one reader in Alaska, no?
• Emily
• Let me tell you about the time I tried to microwave a rutabaga.
• kinda like Rick Santorum being your wedding DJ
• And if not, I'll blog every day in 2011.
• Can't I just call you Ishy?
• It's been quite some time since I mentioned Bob Dylan.
• And because gifts are not to be sneered at, I hereby pledge to be doing something meaningful come this February 29th.