Wonderful wedding yesterday, Josh and Emily's. During the service the reverend talked about "the aroma of love," an unexpected and, quite frankly, jarring image. One that a couple hours later, as we waited for our dinner (and let me give a huge shout out to the Villa di Borally: unbelievable food, and the beef was to kill a vegan for), gave my table mates and me much to ponder. Just what
is the aroma of love? Some of us even thought the best way to answer the question most accurately would be to start listing all the aromas that definitely are
not love; not a fun list to compile. All of which got me thinking about a skinny little book I ran across in a theology class at an all-boys high school, titled
Sex, Love or Infatuation? Indeed. Those three categories seemed a pretty good starting point for classifying various smells, but as I started to chart them, I realized the taxonomy needed one more category--just plain Nope. So, what follows is one man's rating of various could-it-be-the-aroma-of-love odors, along the Sex, Love, Infatuation, Nope continuum.
- New Car Smell--a tricky one; certainly smells like love at first sniff, but just think about the first brake job you'll sink several hundred dollars into, and presto, definite Infatuation
- The Morning's First Hot Cup of Coffee--Sex, completely
- The First Day of School--Nope
- Bananas--Love
- Freshly Cut Grass--for the non-hay fever sufferers, Sex bordering on Love
- Teen Spirit--Infatuation
- Bar-B-Cue Sauce--Love
- Burning Rubber--Sex
- The Guy In The Baggy Shorts Who Makes That Kind Of Toot Sound With His Nose About Once Every Thirty Seconds--Nope
- Napalm In The Morning--Infatuation
- Moth Balls--Love
- Cigar Smoke--Infatuation bordering on Nope
- The Ocean--Sex
- A Secluded Creek--Love
- A Swimming Pool--Infatuation
- A Pond After a Bad Rain Storm--Nope
- Bluejeans Fresh Out of the Dryer--Love
- Listerine--Infatuation
- Juicy Fruit Gum--Infatuation
- Waffle House (any location)--Sex
- The Beef at Villa di Borally--Love
- Going to Work On a National Holiday Monday--Nope
Everything But The Girl-Love Is Strange
