Tesh

So one of the big secrets emerging from the new unauthurorized Oprah bio is that she and John Tesh were an item way back when and that he dumped her? One of the world's richest and most powerful persons, let alone women, and this is the big revelation? Pretty vanilla, no pun intended. Though it does offer the possibilities of coining a few words compliments of that great sounding word--tesh.

• to physically try to touch someone and not quite connect: I just wanted to reach out and touch the hem of Liberace's cape, but I wound up teshing him; he sure does flit around quickly.
• a genre of unusually vapid music: When the moment is too intimate for easy listening music, just put on some tesh.
• fat-free, sugarless vanilla ice cream: I'm on a diet, just a tiny scoop of tesh for me, thank you.
• to be the whitest guy at the party: Oh my God, I was in over my head at that bash; no goatee, no tattoos, no dance moves, silly shoes, and I was drinking Amstel Light--boy I really teshed out there.
• to incite absolutely no fear in your date's father: I totally teshed that guy; he said, "Bring my daughter home in time for her to fix my lunch tomorrow."
• non-descript buttocks: You call that a tush? More like a tesh, if you ask me.
• an exam that in reality was pretty easy: Man I pulled an all-nighter for that test and it turned out to be nothing but easy true and false questions, a total tesh.
• a duel involving nothing more than two guys with impeccable hair smiling at each other until one breaks down. When I dissed his taste in music, he challenged me to a tesh, but since I was having a bad-hair day I had to demur. Dude got me there.
• a sandwich consisting of two pieces of white bread: Sorry, I thought I had some peanut butter or mayo or tuna or even some butter, but I don't. Can I make you a tesh?
• an exclamation of success between two high school nerds when one successfully manages to photoshop a college ID enabling them to gain access to a University library: After looking approvingly at the newly laminated faux ID, Jared looked at Morris and simply said, "Tesh!"
• to be someone's lover then dump them years before he/she becomes one of the world's richest and most powerful persons: Old Sally sure pulled a tesh when she dumped Bill Gates the night of the senior prom.